Florida Thief Has a Moment of Clarity: ‘I’m Not Good at Shoplifting’
We’ve all had to confront a harsh truth about ourselves at some point or another. I’m still coming to terms with the fact that at nearly 30 years old with a beer gut and knees that click when I walk upstairs, my odds of becoming a WWE superstar are dismal at best. It can be devastating, but that moment of self-reflection can also prove beneficial to your growth as a human being, so long as it comes at the right time. But in the case of admitted Florida thief Daniel Kaczmar, he may have been a beat too late in evaluating his criminal mastery.
According to the official Largo police report provided by The Smoking Gun, Daniel walked into a local Walmart late one afternoon and allegedly attempted to lift $35 worth of bicycle equipment by hiding it under his shirt. Walmart loss prevention noticed the theft occur and notified authorities who reviewed the security footage. “The affiant reviewed the store video footage and confirmed the defendant did indeed commit the above listed theft.”
When officer Luis Rodriguez confronted Daniel about the stolen items, the culprit then seemed to have a sudden bout of introspection. Rodriguez notes in the report that once caught, the Florida thief told him, “I’m not good at shoplifting.” Hey, props for admitting it at least.
Daniel’s self-analysis seems to extend beyond this single incident as well. The Smoking Gun notes in their write-up that Daniel was busted at a different Walmart just last month for stealing about $20 worth of, “multiple drinks and sandwiches.” Daniel was also in possession of fentanyl at the time of that arrest which added a drug charge to his rap sheet. Because of prior theft arrests, Daniel was hit with a felony for this latest lick attempt.
On the bright side, at least he can use this time in prison to find things he IS good at. Weightlifting perhaps? Or knitting? Birdwatching? Anything but stealing basically.
